Everlasting,

this is the day you were born.

I am so tired. But today has much to offer.
I'm all java'd up on coffee, but i'm still tired.
I want to see what will become of me.
I decided last night that I want to be a teacher.
it doesn't matter if i don't make alot of money.
I'll be happy anyway.
teachers do make enough money to have their own apartments and cars.
so I think I could deal with that.
and if it's just me, I won't have anything to worry about.
until I get my 1st foster kids.
I'm going to be a foster mom.
either here, or in south africa.
or maybe both.

i just feel like that would fit me.
I want to learn alot of things this year, so I can give alot to my future kids and students.
I want to change.
And I'm excited about that change.
I know that God is doing something big with us.
I'm pretty sure that, even if things seem like crap right now, they will be ok.
we are being tested, stretched, and broken. But God's will, will win in the end.
i don't want to get distracted by what doesn't matter.
which is why I'm taking a year off of boys.
i haven't spent as much time with God as I would have liked.
it's like he's been chasing me, and i've been playing coy with Him.
but no more!
lol

if you read this today, and you want to pray for me, just pray that I will be able to stay focused on what I am learning today, and that I will be able to be creative and work hard.
I don't want to take these classes anymore.
but it is too late to get out of them, and I really need to go to school, i need these credits, and maybe these classes will help me in later years.
next year, or maybe this summer, I start school for being a teacher.
thats my simple dream.

i love you guys.
-Dee

lol

i don't want to be here, i don't know what I'm doing,
and I don't understand how to do it.